Doc Wallace is the village GP.  Formerly a Naval physician, he still has his talking parrot which takes part in consultations. His surgery is very popular with people who are perfectly well; find out why in An Evening at the Doctor’s from the album Archive Editions 2. Warning: contains ‘curative vapours’.

Matron runs the Cottage Hospital like a private hotel where the ambulance is available for light removals and outings.

The District Nurse is a respected disciplinarian going on her rounds in a ‘Tudor’ (Morris Traveller) car.

The Green Flux is a disease specific to Grunty Fen which has broken out sporadically since medieval times.  There is  vital  information on the green flux  – and the attempts to understand, cure and prevent it – in both The Authorised Guide to Grunty Fen and Who’s Who in Grunty Fen.

The Hospital Bed Fence separates Dennis’s plot and Farmer Saltmarsh’s land. Dennis ‘adjusts’ it a couple of inches every year to his advantage.Fence 75pc

The fence is made of old hospital beds which rattle in the wind – because the legs are full of pills hidden there by patients long ago.

Gran’s Cure is a song made up by Dennis in praise of his grandmother’s herbal potion which could remedy just about everything from flaking scalp to athlete’s foot. It’s on the album The Bomb Photo.