My nervous sister Miss Edna and I would like to wish you a very happy Easter and let you know we won’t be doing any egg-related puns as we bring you a free episode from Easter 1994.
Dennis has an Easter present for Mr South, and we don’t think it’ll spoil your enjoyment by telling you that it’s not an egg of any kind.
And we know that Dennis can talk, but in this episode he seems particularly loquacious, as Mr South would no doubt say.
We hope you enjoy this new Fencast, and forgive us if we quickly remind you that if you haven’t yet got your copies of any of the three latest compilations (Archives 12, 13 and 14), they’re still available in the shop. Thank you.
So without further ado, you can now click Fencast for me, pleasewhich will take you to the Podcasts page.
We hope you’ve all got your extra thermal layers on as the weather turns nippier because suddenly it’s that time of year again when we bring you something new for your listening pleasure.
Our new Fencast is full of delights for you. Mr South quizzes our new archivist, Ian (see picture), about his knowledge of Grunty Fen, there’s a free episode from Christmas 1993 and you’ll also hear a bit more about the three new collections of episodes we’ve put together and which are available from Dennis’s shop.
Archive Editions 12 – Scab sees Mr South asking such questions as: What’s the secret of Esme Gartside’s hen house? What’s a standard lamp doing in the Great Puddle? What does Dennis think of the new President? What’s the importance of a Yarmouth dartboard?
Archive Editions 12 features – among other things – African violets, a slither, a balaclava, dandelion and burdock, The Gibbet, Clara Butt, brake blocks, the string on a yo-yo, a tie press, pong, writhing, oo, Grandad’s uniform, the Duchess of Albermarle, illicit liquor, Hopalong Cassidy, Tizer, Shippam’s, nostrils, slot machines, spasms, caustic soda, halo glimmers, divine beds, knitted bathing drawers and Mrs Sharman’s corsets.
Archive Editions 13 – Gt. Harm finds Dennis enlightening Mr South on subjects such as: What doesn’t Mrs Sharp stick out for Tarzan? What’s rife up Pious End? What Dennis has never joined? Why was it a ‘two-pylon’ day?
Archive Editions 13 features – among other things – snuffing and pricking, snogging, an electrified doll, toffee apples, the Peek Frean, the War Office, an emergency po, a faintly glowing beak, fug and shag, Hudson’s soap, carbolic, icebreakers, frittering, Sagger’s Sheds, Mounties, Father Christmas, chafing, Nuaru, guano, boomerangs, beekeepers, a ghillie’s bothy, a final thrust, tight suits, conversions, banging, two long one short and a scrape, natural gas, fundamentalists, blandishments, Shippea Hill, knolls, cowlicks, linseed oil putty and amps and amps and amps.
Archive Editions 14 – Lt. Harm once again finds Mr South having his outlook broadened as Dennis educates him in such aspects of life as: Why is Gran having a heavy wash? What can’t the cat stand? Why didn’t Beryl Burgess want to get her mouse damp? What wasn’t Dennis’s mum very good at?
Archive Editions 14 features – among other things – a Fox’s glacier mint, a gas cape, breaking wind, Mrs Price’s narrow entry, holding two cherries, Digger Shag dottle banging, silverfish, a bobble hat, pig muck, a walrus, a horse-shoe, a concrete mixer, spring fashions, coley, singing, Old Mother Riley, nymphing experience, Bannockburn, Christmas cake 1974, the raising of Lazarus, sowbugs, I-spy books and Deanna Durbin’s hat.
Thank you for your support once again both here and on Dennis’s facebook page. We couldn’t do this without you. My nervous sister, Miss Edna and I, on behalf of all at Grunty Fen, would like to wish you the very best of the festive season, and we hope the New Year is good to you.
My nervous sister Miss Edna and I are delighted to announce not one, not two, but THREE new things for your listening pleasure.
First up is a new Fencast for Easter, in which Mr South explains more about Easter in Grunty Fen followed by an episode from 1991 all about Easter Traditions in our favourite bleak, damp and flat location.
Next, we have Archive Editions 10 – Slapp, which poses such questions as why is there a moose in the Miscellaneous Shed? Where does Dennis take the Christmas fender? Why doesn’t he want his gusset scrutinised? What new enterprise is he considering?
Archive Editions 10 features – amongst other things – the chewing-gum valve, chamois leather, a full chamber pot, the Enclosure Acts, rubbers, an Elastoplast, Queen Salote of Tonga, pipecleaners, ullage, Weasenham St Peter, knolls and gorges, mudmogs, sink tidies, chicken muck, waterboatmen, cowlicks, a Stygian morass of miasmic effluvia and a moose’s nostrils.
Click Slapp for me, please to take you to the right place in the shop to find out more.
And finally, we present Archive Editions 11 – Windy Huts, which raises various subjects including Dennis finding a key in a very unusual place, an easy-going young man called Ziggy, the etiquette of bus stops and mystical forces from beyond this realm.
Archive Editions 11 features – amongst other things – Gran’s drawer, mauve fried bread, gentleman’s fragrance, flooding, an ambulance, pot plants, Ambrose, quiffs, apologies, an angel with the monk on, lady wrestlers and Cyril’s trilby.
It’s that time of the year again when we give you a FREE episode to listen to as a little Christmas treat.
This new Grunty Fencast brings a seasonal reflection from Mr South followed by the Christmas episode from 1991. When Dennis pops into The Bull, he finds that his friends and neighbours are having difficulty summoning up some Christmas cheer. Until, that is…
…well, you’ll just have to listen to it, won’t you?
Please click on Fencasts to go to our podcasts page, and Christmas Cheer is podcast number 6.
We’d also like to draw your attention to a little clip on YouTube, where you can hear a snippet from our new collection Archive Editions 8 whilst watching the big old tape recorder going round. To find the clip, please click Dennis and The Cheese Wire.
Don’t forget, our shop is always open for CDs, downloads, maps, and Mr South’s excellent books.
We’d like to thank you for your custom and wish you all a happy, safe and warm festive season and we look forward to being of service to you next year.
As the nights are getting long and even darker than the days let us lighten your hearts with an episode of Dennis of Grunty Fen from 2002; the Christmas episode in fact.
Hear Dennis describing the Grunty Fen Christmas Social to Mr South.
Gasp at the Christmas decorations and their anagrams.
Wonder at the high survival rate of attendees to the Social.
Click the triangle to play the episode.
Think of this as a little Christmas present from all of us at Grunty Fen and Mr South (and poor Mrs South) to you. Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
To cheer you up a bit during these strange times we thought you’d like to hear from Mr South so we have a new Fencast for you!
The problem with calling people on the telephone is that you don’t know what they’re doing at the other end. They might be up to their elbows in soap-suds, or up the other end of the garden, knee-deep in compost and nettles.
But with Mr South, you know that he’ll be mostly thinking.
So when he got a phone call from someone in distress needing help, he did think about it. But had he put himself in danger?
And where does the Bus Shelter (pictured below) fit in?
Find out more on our Fencasts page by listening to Help! Help! Mr South!
I must admit that when I heard the phone ringing in the kiosk outside AGAIN, I was in quite a bad mood because as you all know I’m a very busy woman and I haven’t time to chat to all and sundry.
Turns out it was only Mr South, who’d been making a nuisance of himself constantly making the phone ring. He went on and on about some picnic or something, as you can hear in our new Fencast. It’ll also explain why there’s Modern Ferretting down below.
Well dear readers I have some exciting news for you : Mr South’s fourth book about Grunty Fen has been published!
WHERE TO FIND A WARM BUCKET
And other TALL TALES of a LOW PLACE
This book is the fourth of Mr South’s series of investigations into the world of Grunty Fen. Described by the author as “…non-existent tourist trails around imaginary locations…variable geography, questionable history and unreliable truth…”
Discover an English region you never knew existed yet it is right on your doorstep. Up that boggy lane, behind those thorny bushes, over that stagnant ditch.
Let Christopher South lead you on a strange East Anglian journey to meet outcasts who can neuter wrens in flight and crafters who whittle whisks and whistles. But don’t go near the radioactive cosmetics and plague laboratories.
And don’t forget your bucket.
About 90 glorious pages plus an introduction and a free index.
The WARM BUCKET will be available very shortly. The people at McCaw Press (they now look after all the Grunty Fen books) tell me the books will be ready by Tuesday 10th December so that Father Christmas can have some if he wishes.
How cheering to hear on the wireless today a reminder that on this day in 1969 some brave men took off in a big rocket to travel to the moon with the intention of walking upon it! Imagine that.
Of course I remember back in 1969 when I first heard, on the same wireless, news of the original lunar landing. How exciting that was. We had such a demand in the shop for rocket-shaped iced-lollies that Dennis nearly wore his lips out sucking ordinary lollies into a pointed shape.
Speaking of Dennis, here is a clip of him reminiscing with Mr South about the lunar landing.
The clip is taken from an episode of Dennis called “Venusians” which you can download or play for your own personal use from here.
Dennis recently reminded me of the wondrous occasion when I and he were children the people of Grunty Fen and surrounding villages held a re-enactment of the terrible day in the 16th century when the the Revenue men of Cambridge came to the fens. But I’ll let Dennis describe this himself with words “out of his head”.
A Ren'actment eh? We 'ad one of them in Grunty Fen once. We Ren'acted the occasion from the olden days when the revenue came from Cambridge to the Fen to discuss with the roobab men how much tax they owed. Yer see, back then rhubarb grew in the wild and was basically free food to yer average fenman. But some folks took to making roobab wine, then they distilled it an' sold it as rooshine. which upset the Revenue them not getting any share so they work pretty hard to discuss it with the roobab men. The roobab men discussed it just as hard back agin. Eventch'lly as ya know the rhubarb died out and the revenue lost int'rest. In the ren'acment the roobab men was armed with sticks of roobab (jus' like the real event) an' the revenue rattled chains as they try to catch the roobabs to arrest 'em. Still remember the chant of "rhubarb, rhubarb" from the roobab mob.
So there you have it. It was a rather unruly mob stumbling around, as I recall, waving lengths of rhubarb. As you would expect some ended up in custody.
Yours sincerely Miss Edwards Grunty Fen General Stores and Post Office
